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| Jessica Alba | Jane Bullard | |
| Mike Myers | Guru Pitka / Young Pitka / Teenage Pitka / Himself | |
| Justin Timberlake | Jacques Grande | |
| Romany Malco | Darren Roanoke | |
| Meagan Good | Prudence Roanoke | |
| Omid Djalili | Guru Satchabigknoba | |
| Verne Troyer | Coach Punch Cherkov | |
| Ben Kingsley | Guru Tugginmypudha | |
| Jessica Simpson | Herself | |
| Kanye West | Himself | |
| Deepak Chopra | Himself | |
| Rob Blake | Himself | |
| Manu Narayan | Rajneesh | |
| John Oliver | Dick Pants | |
| Stephen Colbert | Jay Kell |
| Director |
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| Producer | Roger Birnbaum
Gary Barber |
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| Writer | Mike Myers
Graham Gordy |
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Pitka an American raised outside of his country by gurus, returns to the States in order to break into the self-help business. His first challenge: To settle the romantic troubles and subsequent professional skid of a star hockey player whose wife left him for a rival athlete. |
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